Words to Live By Since 1993 A SPIFF Publication Vol. 2, No. 50 We're a Newtist colony! The Spiff Response As has become the tradition to which we all look forward whenever Bill takes over C-Span and the minor networks, we at Spiff once again present our response to Bill's remarks last Thursday night. You heard Bill. You heard Fred Thompson. So without further adieu, we bring you the Spiff response. First the statements that once again point out the difference between us and them. Bill said that he ran for President (Remember, this was back when President Clinton was still under wraps.) "to restore the American dream" to us poor slobs who were incapable of attaining it ourselves. More than anything, this points out the arrogance of liberalism. The American dream is not Bill's to give, or President Clinton's or the Republican majority's or even for us here at Spiff. It is the end result of self-determination and hard work. It cannot be given. It can only be achieved. Bill said that there is too much negativity in American politics today. Would he have said that if his party still had control of Congress? Or, for that matter, would he even have been making that speech? As if we needed to remind you, the most repeated quote from Positive Bill over the last year has been, "No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no!" The fact is that this administration has repeatedly tripped over its own half-truths, distortions, and lies and the people now have outlets and information to give them the whole story. That's why people remember things like the difference between Bill 1992 ("Middle-class taxpayers will have a choice between a children's tax credit or a significant reduction in their tax rate.") and Bill 1993 claiming that he never understood where the media got that silly notion that he promised a tax cut. With the advent of C-Span, the growth of talk radio (led by Rush, head of the House Ditto-head Caucus) and yes, even humble little fax newsletters, the people now have ways of knowing what politicians say and judging for themselves. Thus the choice they made Nov. 8. Now, to the specifics on taxes. Class, please take out your Econ 101 books. Bill is now of the opinion that some Americans are "being punished for their productivity." Well, duh! Most of them are being punished by the taxes that Bill and his buddies in the extinct lib majority pushed on us last year. The people remembered the one-vote landslide that sucked more out of the paycheck. Do the words "gas tax" mean anything to you defeated Democrats? (We know they mean everything to some of you.) Bill wants to target his new-found desire for tax cuts to "working people," and he defines that term as anyone making up to, but not over, $75,000 a year_yet another drop in the "wealthiest Americans" segment of our society. You may remember during the 1992 campaign. The "wealthiest Americans" were the top one percent of earners. Then, after the election, that number dropped to anyone making over $200,000 per year. Under Bill's tax plan you are now rich if you make $75,000.01 per year. No wonder Bill thinks incomes are falling. How will he pay for it? Well, he has instructed Vice Vice President Owl Gore to fit over 60 small agencies in the Department of Housing and Urban Development into four big ones and make unspecified changes at the Energy and Transportation departments. Meanwhile, Senator Phil Gramm of Texas has proposed a 16% cut in all domestic departments that will save $124 billion and has already said that the Department of Education shouldn't sign a new lease on its office space. Sen. Gramm proposes doubling the per-child tax credit to $5,000 each year. Speaker Newt has slashed the staffs in the House and has set his sights on the National Endowment for the Liberal Arts and the Corporation for Public Brainwashing_er, Broadcasting. That's progress, folks. Rather than move the pieces around on the chess board, Republicans propose to start the game over, or consider that maybe we should start a different game altogether. Another thing that separates us from them. The more things chaaange, the more they stay the same. The same attitude that got the Clintons into this mess prevails. Oh, it may be hiding beneath the plaaanned firing of Joycelyn Elders, the sudden recognition that we need to defend our country, and now the tax cut, but it is still there. And that is the danger. If they can pull off this reinventing of President Clinton and Bill and get reelected in 1996, they will have no problem moving forward with the agenda we have already rejected. We must be diligent. Merry Christmas! Peace on Earth? It's the most wonderful time of the year here at the Spiff Executive Plaza, towering above beautiful (but gaudily decorated) Donelson, Tennessee. An extra special sense of celebration is in the air this year. Not only is it the Christmas season, time to celebrate the birth of Christ, but Republicans control the 104th Congress. The liberal I-have-been-for-that-tax-cut-for-years Democrats are trying to outdo each other with tax cuts (smoke and mirrors, folks). And now there is peace on earth, at least according to what Bill said during President Clinton's Christmas in Washington infomercial. According to President Clinton (Bill spoke, but she nodded to let us know he read it as she told him.) for the first time in our history we will be able to celebrate Christmas with the security of knowing that no missiles are pointed at our children. The last time we checked the Spiff Nuclear Missile Database, not only were there missiles in the wrong hands, but there are no nuclear warheads that vaporize only adults, not children. They all just kind of break everything. Yes, you know that the missiles are pointed at cities, not children, and that President Clinton thinks we are not smart enough to recognize the difference. We at Spiff know that you not only know this, but you also know that if our current administration will not give our military the freedom to stop The Warlord, or airlift supplies to Bosnia, or to stay the heck out of Haiti, then how will they be able to detect, much less stop, any attack on us? Yes, this is a time to celebrate, and the climate of the world is yet again changing, but we ask: how long until the Arabs decide they want the Gaza strip back? How long until the Israelis return to their homeland and they again start crowding out the Arabs? How long until the Soviet remains begin to reach alliances with each other and form a new non-communist (?) coalition? How long until Sodom Hussein starts thinking like a laboratory mouse and tries to take over the world again? How long until the third world countries decide to try their secret nuclear weapons that don't exist? Do we live in a peaceful world? While this article is written, the evening news is announcing boyfriends who beat their girlfriends to death and pregnant women who are run down in broad daylight by drunk drivers and mail bombs and guns in school and the list goes on. Where does peace come from? It comes from time spent with your family celebrating. It comes from time spent in church rejoicing over the birth of the Savior. It comes from the smile of little children on Christmas day. It comes from Jesus. Pray for peace this Christmas and share it with your friends and family. Merry Christmas! Quote of the weak: "" The ACLU Quote of the strong: "Merry Christmas!" Your friends at Spiff Words to Live By is published every week at about this time by Spiff. You can send a fax to us here in the Spiff Executive Plaza, towering over beautiful downtown Donelson, Tennessee at 615-883-0435.