Words to Live By Since 1993 A SPIFF Publication Vol. 2, No. 19 No, I'm not a Kennedy. My pants just fell down. Our Racist Policy Last week, President Clinton and Bill edged closer to yet another foreign policy disaster by threatening the use of American military power to force the current rulers of Haiti from power and return President Jean Bertrand Artistide to that county. Why are we now so interested in risking American lives to affect the fortunes of Haiti? Isn't this the same administration that labeled President Bush's Haitian policy "racist' to get a few black votes and once safely in power followed the exact same policy? What has changed? Well, of course you do realize that this administration cares more than the last, so it is impossible to follow a "racist" policy. But the real change has come about because of a racist agenda. We are flip-flopping once again, as we have so many times in other parts of the world, because President Clinton and Bill are now feeling the pressure brought to bear by the Congressional (Liberal) Black Caucus and the hunger strike by Randall Robinson, the President of Trans-Africa (which, strangely enough, he runs from America). Where does a racist policy fit into all of this? President Bush did not follow a course of racism. To their minimal credit (and until they change the policy) neither are President Clinton and Bill. The people who are using racism are the members of the Congressional (Liberal) Black Caucus. Think back to the debate over the use of force in the Gulf War. How many of the C(L)BC supported President Bush in Kuwait? None. How often do the C(L)BC members vote to strip bare our military budget? Always. So, what's the difference? Why did some of the C(L)BC members even side with Rep. Henry Gonzales in his attempt to impeach President Bush for committing American forces to the Persian Gulf and now demand that President Clinton and Bill invade Haiti? Could it be that Haiti is a predominantly black country? Hmmm? When the chips are down in Kuwait, Bosnia, Grenada, Libya, Nicaragua, or Panama, the black leadership in Congress violently opposes any American intervention and, in fact, reviles the American military establishment. But when black lives are at stake in a black county, they will go so far as to starve themselves and get arrested in front of the White House. This is racist. The real problem is that they know they have a President who can't stand to go against the polls, unless she is trying to raise taxes or socialize medicine. On all other issues, this administration is soft and unsure. So the direction of an entire nation can be determined by one man on a hunger strike. The leadership of this administration is pathetic. There's No Place Like Home Over the past few years, it has become fashionable among some groups to stick the name of another country in front of the word "American" when describing oneself, just so we know exactly where the ancestors of that group came from. Of course you know that we here at Spiff believe that this only causes division among people and, to be honest, we think it is downright silly. If F.W. De Klerk decided to move to Miami, would the Congressional (Liberal) Black Caucus allow him to be called an African-American? But we decided to think about this trend, and the more we thought, the more interesting it became. You might have noticed that this little fad has not caught on in other countries. You don't hear the terms "Mexican-Canadian" or "African-French" very often. So we decided to pull the maps off the walls of the Spiff Executive Plaza, towering over beautiful downtown Donelson, Tennessee and play a little geography. Please indulge us as we move some people around the world for a few minutes. If you move from South Carolina to the West Indies are you a South-Carolinian-West-Indian? If you move from the Northern half of South Africa to the Southern half of South Africa are you a North-South-African-South-African? If you move from Greece to Turkey are you a Greecey-Turkey? If you move form Northern Ireland to Ireland are you a Northern-Irish-Irishman? If you are from Greenland, but go to school at Berkeley, are you a Greenpeace? If you move from the Czech Republic to Australia are you a Czech-Mate? If you move from one impoverished South American country to another, are you a Parauruguayan? If you move from Iceland to Chile, what happens? If you move from India to the Midwest U.S., are you an Indianindianapolitan? If you move from Colombia to Alaska, are you used to the snow? If you move from Tibet to Pigeon Forge, do you live in Dalilamawood? If you move from Hamburg to Switzerland, are you a Cheeseburger? Hey, Hey, Paula In last week's edition of WTLB, we discussed the lack of moral leadership, or even class exhibited by the people currently in power. As is usually the case, we were immediately proven correct by the sexual harassment suit filed by Paula Jones. In the suit, Jones claims that Bill Clinton asked her to meet him in a room at the Little Rock Excelsior Hotel and exposed himself to her, asking her to feel a little more than his pain. The fun part about all of this is not that the lawsuit has actually been filed. This kind of smut only serves to tear down public officials, some of which actually want to do some good. The part that is enjoyable is to watch is the damage control mentality that has once again seized the White House. As soon as the charges became public, the first reaction of the administration, naturally, was to lie about it. Their first spin was "this couldn't have happened the way Jones said because Bill Clinton wasn't even at the hotel." Now we find that several people have come forward with signed affidavits that Clinton was not only there, but they spoke to him personally. Bill must have just forgotten. You know, the way he forgot that he gave his mother $20,000 to buy a house that he visited all the time and the way President Clinton forgot to pay taxes on $6,000 in earnings even though she always remembered to take tax deductions for Bill's dirty underwear. This is yet another demonstration of the "government by tornado drill" mentality now in fashion. Many of you may remember tornado drills. When the alarm goes off you scurry into the halls of your school and sit against the wall with your legs crossed, your head in your lap, and your hands covering your head. Every time the alarm of another scandal crisis goes off, that is the reaction we get. White House officials hunker down, blast everybody, and claim that each one of these ethical flare-ups is a right-wing-funded plot to damage their president. Guys, we couldn't find this much sleaze if we tried. There has to be something there. Just blaming everything on your opponents will only work for so long. If watching them squirm is the fun part, the sad part is watching the presidency suffer under this barrage of sleaze. Liberals will tell you that the sleaze is an onslaught from outside the White House. We here at Spiff believe that it has its roots in the Oval Office. No one would have believed such allegations against Jimmy Carter, Gerald Ford, President Bush or The President. The fact is that so many of these charges are believable because of who is in the White House. That is the saddest thing of all. If these people conducted themselves with any degree of dignity, none of this would get any attention whatsoever. Remember when we had presidents who not only drew respect to the office but actually respected the office themselves? Quote of the weak: "Well, I think his policies are perfect, yes." Jimmy Carter Quote of the strong: "I don't think we've had a president this century who understood less about small business and entrepreneurship." Jack Kemp Words to Live By is published every week at about this time by Spiff. You can send a fax to us here in the Spiff Executive Plaza, towering over beautiful downtown Donelson, Tennessee at 615-883-0435.