Words to Live By Since 1993 A SPIFF Publication Vol. 1, No. 5 If you pray for the ACLU, will they sue you? Yasser, That's our president One could not help but be moved by the images coming out of Washington last week. Yes, even we here at Spiff were touched by the apparent peace that is being forged in the Middle East. While we stand back and admire the agreement that Israel and the PLO have managed to create, some things must be said (because the medialibs won't say them). ù Spiff is completely, utterly, unequivocally, (and any other ly's) opposed to the placement of American troops in Gaza or in Jericho. While the majority of Israelis and Palestinians may welcome the treaty, there is a small but determined group who are violently opposed to the agreement and have no problem driving a truck full of explosives into the barracks. ù This entire process is yet another benefit from the administration of the president, Ronald Reagan. When we defeated Soviet communism (and yes, we did defeat it) the PLO lost its sponsor state and its money. It's a shame that the medialibs like to forget that, but fortunately we are here to say what they should: "Thank you, Mr. President." ù The United States had our diplomatic clock cleaned by Norway (Norway?!). Our government, which does not believe in a coherent foreign policy, (i.e. Bosnia, Somalia, NAFTA) had nothing to do with this process. Spiff salutes the government of Norway for doing what our government could not or would not do. ù With President Clinton looking on in admiration, (envy?) Bill stood on the dais with Mr. Rabin and Mr. Arafat. If you watched the ceremony on television, did you notice how Bill kept shifting back and forth on the platform, to ensure that he was always behind the speaker and thus on camera? How pathetic. How predictable. How Bloodworth-Thomasonesque. How Bill. Hey, Bill, the people really don't like taxes! Reports are streaming in from across the nation about the reaction of voters to the tax Bill (Yes, we meant to capitalize Bill.) and the Congresslibs who voted for it. Our Washington Bureau sends this report. When she met with her constituents for the first time after casting the deciding vote on the tax Bill, Rep. Marjorie Margolies-Mezvinsky (Democrat*- Penn.) was called "two-faced, cynical, wishy-washy, a liar, a dupe, and, worst of all, just another politician." (Ooh, that one hurts!) And just think, for voting "Yes" on the tax Bill and enduring the wrath of her constituents, Margie was promised a visit by President Clinton and Bill! (Yippee!) The Texas Record News reported that at a meeting of Rep. Bill Sarpalius (Democrat*-Texas) "no ropes or torches were seen, but the packed town meeting here Wednesday night at times had the feel of a lynching." The Augusta Chronicle announced its regrets in endorsing Rep. Don Johnson (Democrat*-Georgia) in last fall's election and reported that he was booed mercilessly at a meeting when he refused to take questions from the floor. Maybe after 1994 Don can get a job with the Miami police department. Locally, we had only one House Congresslib who voted for the tax Bill. That great fighter for values and lower taxes, Democrat* Bart Gordon! (Trust us, folks. His nickname ain't "Flash Gordon." It's closer to "Dim Bulb.") Intrepid Spiff reporter Marsha Blackburn attended one of his town meetings and found the attitude toward Bulb to be genuinely hostile. His constituents told him that, for the million years he has been in Washington and the amount of money he has been paid over the years, he should have dealt with this daffuhzit by now. We really need to get this goof out of there, but it is going to be tough. Are you aware that Bulb is so frugal with both our money and his that he pays his "volunteers" (most of whom have no idea where he stands on the issues) on the MTSU campus during elections? *of course! The reviews are in! Reviews from our readers have been pouring into the fax machine at Spiff Executive Plaza, towering over beautiful downtown Donelson, Tennessee. Here are some of our favorites: ù "This is great!" Marsha Blackburn, Brentwood ù "Thank you for 'Words to Live By'!" David Mueller, Westmoreland ù "Please cancel our subscription to your 'publication.'" Misguided newspaper editorette, Brentwood ù "Aaaaaa! Spiff!" Jan Poole, her own little world Do you have comments for us? Fax them to us. We might read them. Do you want to make copies of WTLB for your friends? Go ahead. Knock yourself out. (That's just an expression, Dr. Kevorkian.) Fax us the names and fax numbers of deadbeats who read yours before you get to it. Quote of the weak: "If it took a Republican to go to China... maybe it takes a Democrat to reinvent government. DNC chairman David Wilhelm Quote of the strong: "Boo!" Members of the Christian Coalititon, during the Wilhelm speech. Words to Live By is published every week at about this time by Spiff. You can send a fax to us here in the Spiff Executive Plaza, towering over beautiful downtown Donelson, Tennessee at 615-883-0435.